Ditonton saat Pipis, dan 29 Hal Lain yang Hanya Dialami Para Ibu

Like members of a secret society, mothers are the only people who can ever understand certain things. Sometimes all we can do is sympathize with each other and laugh. Here are things that every mothers will relate to—for better or for worse.

*Gambar dari sini

1. Dibanding beberapa hal lain di dunia, you care more about the consistency of poop.

2. Picking up another human to smell their butt—di tengah keramaian sekalipun—is not only normal, it’s necessary.

3. A little poop on your fingers is really no big deal…

4. …and it’s perfectly okay to include poop in daily conversation.

5. You become stink proof. Pee, poop, puke, … bring them on.

6. Memiliki pengetahuan baru → tissue basah bisa membersihkan—almost—everything.

7. Isi lemari baju setelah melahirkan terbagi menjadi dua kategori: regular clothes, and fat clothes…

8. …lalu merasakan kejayaan luar biasa saat (akhirnya) kembali muat memakai baju-baju sebelum hamil.

9. You can do four different things at the same time.

10. Your purse transforms into kantong Doraemon. Hanya Tuhan yang tahu apa yang ada di dalamnya…

11. …dan lebih mudah menemukan pospak atau mainan dibanding lipstick.

12. You say weird phrases you never thought you’d say.
“Sepatunya jangan digigit-gigit!”
“Turun dari kursi pakai kaki, bukan pakai tangan!”

13. Your moments alone are like holidays…

14. …and taking a shower is a luxury, not a necessity.

15. Peeing with an audience is part of the daily routine.

16. Your favourite hangouts are parenting forums and online mommy groups…

17. …and your social circle gets reduced to parents whose child are your child’s age.

18. There’s a finger in your eye, your ear, or up your nose. And it’s not yours.

19. Saat di mobil, bisa mengobrol dengan suami tanpa ada yang interupsi—mungkin sekitar seribu kali—merupakan momen langka.

20. Jok belakang mobil (dan bagian karpet) ada remah-remah biskuit, atau sisa lolipop, atau potongan cokelat yang telah meleleh—atau ketiganya sekaligus.

21. You eat leftovers on your child’s plate instead of serving yourself…

22. …and you can’t remember the last time you ate without cutting food on someone else’s plate.

23. You’re not in any of your own vacation photos.

24. Bisa menerjemahkan apapun yang dikatakan anak usia 1,5 tahun. The world might hear a gibberish sound, but you? You knows. It’s a secret code.

25. You build extra visionary powers by learning to watch two different things from both eyes. Satu mata ke anak, satu mata ke panci di atas kompor.

26. You know the pain of stepping on a Lego piece.

27. An uninterrupted nap excites you more than uninterrupted sex.

28. Makna happy hour bukan lagi waktu diskon di tempat karaoke atau restoran, tapi 60 menit between your child going to bed, and you going to bed.

29. Silence is GOLDEN.

30. Three words had disappeared from your dictionary: sleep, peace, and sanity. What’s that?

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ABOUT THE AUTHOR

Amelia Yustiana is a mother of two imaginative little boys. Now she’s pregnant with baby number three. She does have a husband who tolerates her random personality, but she’s not sure why. She previously worked for Jawa Pos Group and Femina Group, where she spent more than 9 years with the last position as senior editor before quitting the office job and becoming a stay at home mom.

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